Tuesday, February 7, 2012

No Knowledge Can Cure The Broken

I probably took 20 personality tests in high school alone, and a few more in my college years. My personality hasn't changed much, maybe with a little more maturity I have learned to relax a bit, and have less reasons to be bossy. But overall, I have always been a pretty "sanguine" person. Being a Psychology major leaves me taking classes like Theories of Personality and Developmental Psychology, and Social Psychology. I am consistently learning how different people work, as individuals or groups. How different personalities react and interact. How disorders affect an individual.

Someone around me is hurting. And these classes aren't helping me.
My knowledge is almost useless.

I can't relate, I can't help, and I am starting to find myself running away. I want to go into the field of Psychology so I can help, but I am learning that it may be the hardest thing ahead of me. It is scary.

I am beginning to detach myself from this person, losing a connection, being cold and numb, because I don't want to accept there is hurting so deep that no hobby or close friend can help.

The worst part is, is that I can't understand, I can't feel what she is feeling, I can't fix what is being broken, and I can't convince her to love life like I do.